I’ve been feeling so…..blank lately. Just blank. Like I have nothing to say or offer. I put one foot in front of the other and just keep going.
And every night I am so thankful for tomorrow. To start fresh. A new beginning. 
I realize now more than ever that I’m not in control of everything. And that is all right with me. I think it’s exactly where God wants me to be. Relying on Him more than myself. Acknowledging that I need His help every single day. If things go wrong, it is not the end of the world. And if it is the end of the world…well, God’s in charge of that, too.

Stepping out in faith – knowing that I don’t have it all together. I don’t have everything figured out. And that’s ok.

We had our first family night without my mother-in-law. And it felt surreal. I kept thinking, “She just HAS to still be here.” I think we are still in shock, and it will take time to get used to the idea that we’ll never see her again on this earth.

My in-law’s house has HER written all over it. The glass baskets that she collected, all the pretty things that she loved, the purple bathroom, the pictures on the fridge, the food on the counter…they all are a GIANT reminder of HER. And it just seems impossible that she’s not there.

We grieve, but we have hope.

Thanks for letting me ramble.

14 thoughts on “Hope

  1. Yes it will take time. I feel your pain and pray you find renewed peace each day. You are on the path. You know the Lord of heaven and earth and that makes all the difference.Joyce

  2. She is with you, even this very second. The Lord has her home now and I'm sure she is at peace. She will watch over you and the family, daily. Has she came to you in your dreams, or your husbands yet? Any other family member heard from her? Be patient, she will let you know somehow that she's ok. XO

  3. I'm so sorry for the loss your family is going through. I know we don't know each other, but I felt that I could share with you that we lost my mother-in-law six years ago. Not a day goes by we don't miss her – she was one-of-a-kind, and we saw her hand in everything that was in her home. The days/years do get easier, but there will always be a place in your heart that misses her. Don't be afraid to go through the waves of grief – God is there each and every step. It's definitely a process of many emotions. Praying for you and your family. So glad you had one of those relationships with your mother-in-law that is rare and beautiful!

  4. aimee, i could feel your pain as i read your post. i have suffered loss in my life and it does get easier. just know that you will all be reunited some day again. we are not on this earth for very long and i hope that brings you some joy and hope. when i lost my oldest sister, someone shared those very same words with me and it just helped. i cant explain, but it truly made me feel better and know that one day i will see her again. i have asked for signs to 'see' her again and have had such vivid dreams where she tells me she is ok and i know she is in a much more beautiful place. blessings to you as you struggle thru such a difficult time. xoxo

  5. oh Aimee, my heart crys out for you and your family. Lessons of Life can be so hard at times, but keep your focus on HIM even when it becomes blurry with tears. He has promised us Eternal Life together with Him…..Let this be as ointment on the pain. Knowing we serve a Mighty, Awesome God. Mark Shultz has a beautiful song "Love Has Come" I know this life is filled with sorrow And there are days when the pain just lasts and lasts But I know there will come a day When all our tears are washed away with a break in the clouds His glory coming down and in that momentEvery knee shall bow, every tongue confessThat God is love and love has come for us allEvery heart set free, everyone will seeThat God is love and love has come for us all For anybody who has ever lost a loved oneAnd you feel like you had to let go too soonI know it hurts to say goodbyeBut don't you know it's just a matter of time 'til the tears are gonna endYou'll see him once again and in that momentEvery knee shall bow, every tongue confessThat God is love and love has come for us allEvery heart set free, everyone will seeThat God is love and love has come for us allOh, and on that day we will stand amazedAt our savior, God and kingJust to see the face of amazing graceAs our hearts rise up and sing…….I pray Peace and Rest unto you as you grow in His abiding Love. Colleen

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